Reviewing effect: what do I want the reader to feel?
Writing is a message sent to a reader. Before you judge your text, ask: what effect do I want? For example calm, worry, humour, wonder, or sadness. This is your intended effect.
Then read your draft as a stranger would. Ask: what does it really make me feel? If the draft meant to be calm but sounds rushed, there is a gap. Reviewing the effect means finding that gap.
- Say the aim in one short line before you start.
- Read the draft slowly, once, only to feel it.
- Mark places where the feeling breaks or goes the wrong way.
Four lenses for review
Look at your draft through four lenses. For each one ask: does this help my intended effect or work against it?
- Word choice: "walked" is plain; "crept" feels afraid; "strolled" feels relaxed. One word can change the feeling.
- Sentence length: short sentences feel quick or tense. Long sentences feel slow, calm or dreamy.
- Pictures (images): a clear picture the reader can see, hear or smell works better than a general statement.
- Order of ideas: what comes first and last is remembered. Put the strongest idea where it hits hardest.
Revising: cut, swap, reorder
Revising means changing the text to bring it closer to the intended effect. It is bigger than fixing spelling. Use three moves:
- Cut: remove words, lines or ideas that do not help. "He was very, very sad" often becomes "He was sad".
- Swap: exchange a weak or vague word for a stronger, exact one. "Went quickly" becomes "dashed".
- Reorder: move a sentence or idea so the effect builds. Place the surprise last.
You can also add a missing picture or link. Change one thing at a time and re-read after each change.
Revising versus editing, and testing the result
Do the big job first. Revising looks at effect, ideas, order and style. Editing and proofreading come last and fix spelling, grammar and punctuation. Fixing commas in a line you will cut wastes time.
Test it
- Read aloud. Your ear finds clumsy, long or repeated parts that your eye skips.
- Ask a reader one question: "What did you feel?" Do not explain first.
- Rest it. Leave it for an hour or a day and read again with fresh eyes.
If the feeling matches your aim, the revision worked. If not, go round again.
Try it
Write three lines about a rainy evening meant to feel calm. Read aloud. Cut one word, swap one word, and move one line. Does it feel calmer?
Key formulas and definitions
- Effect check = what I wanted - what the reader felt
- Four lenses: words, sentence length, images, order
- Revise = cut + swap + reorder (and add if needed)
- Revising first, editing (spelling, grammar) last
Worked examples
1. Intended effect: calm. Draft: "She ran into the quiet garden, grabbed a seat and sat down fast." What is wrong and how will you fix it?
The words "ran", "grabbed" and "fast" feel rushed, so they work against calm. Swap them: "She walked into the quiet garden and sat down slowly." Now the verbs match the aim.
2. A paragraph says "The room was really very extremely dark." Which move helps and what is the new line?
Cut (and swap). One strong word is better than three weak ones: "The room was dark." Or give a picture: "She could not see her own hand."
3. A story hides the surprise in the first line and ends with a long weather description. Which lens is wrong and what is the fix?
Order of ideas. Reorder so the surprise comes last and the weather moves earlier.
4. Your friend reads your funny story and says "I felt sad". What do you do?
Treat it as a gap: the aim was humour but the feeling was sad. Review the four lenses (maybe slow long sentences and sad words), revise, and test with the friend again.
Common mistakes
- Fixing only spelling and calling it revision. Revising changes effect, ideas, order and style first.
- Having no aim. Without an intended effect you cannot say if the draft is better or worse.
- Adding more words to sound big. Cutting extra words often makes the effect stronger.
- Defending the draft when a reader reports a different feeling. The reader's feeling is the data; use it.